The 7 Most Important Relationship Lessons

#6

You’re about to read the next episode of Amy’s Story, Lesson 6.

Chances are you’ve made the mistake Lesson 6 will warn you about.

Or you would’ve made it…

Except you’re now about to learn from Amy’s experience.

So sit back as we again go back in time to a scene from her past…

If you’re hungry, first grab something to eat…

And then enjoy the next episode.

Still hungry?

Don’t say I didn’t warn you… ?

Amy’s Story

Lesson 6

The car rumbled along…

Or was that her stomach?

Amy hadn’t eaten in hours. Unlike Carter, she didn’t bring protein bars.

She watched him drive. It was her car. He drove it like it was his.

At Everybody Smiles, the non-profit Amy worked at, she was the boss.

She liked it that way.

But at home — in their relationship — Carter was in charge.

She liked it that way, too.

“I’m hungry, Carter.”

“We’ll be in the city in about an hour. I know a great Mexican restaurant.”

Amy was not necessarily in the mood for Mexican. Or great food.

She just wanted to eat.

Sooner, the better…

She had to admit though — she admired Carter’s decisiveness.

Her previous boyfriends always asked for her opinion. She appreciated it. But she didn’t respect it.

She respected Carter.

And she appreciated that he cared enough about her to take her only to great restaurants.

He had great taste in food.

Amy’s stomach growled…

72 MINUTES LATER

As they walked into the restaurant, live music blasted in Amy’s ears, and the smell of delicious Mexican food danced in her nostrils.

She definitely craved Mexican now.

And what a fun place!

Carter was right. As always.

She wrapped her arms around his waist.

The host smiled at them. “Party of 2?”

Carter pointed. “I want that table. With the ocean view.”

“That’d be a half hour wait, sir.”

Carter instantly nodded. “We can wait.”

If Amy’s stomach had a mouth, it’d scream, “YOU can wait! I’m dying here!”

Amy smiled and nodded.

She could no longer hear the live music. Her stomach screamed with growls.

43 MINUTES LATER

As they sat at the table, Amy focused on the breathtaking ocean view to distract from the hunger.

Carter was right. As always.

How did he know the view would be so beautiful?

Sure, she’d need to eat the whole restaurant — including the staff — to satisfy her hunger now, but that view…

Worth every second…

Worth every growl…

68 MINUTES LATER

Amy’s hunger hurt so much she’d happily drink an ocean of hot sauce to end it.

Speaking of hot sauce, that was the color of Carter’s face.

As their distressed waitress walked by, he flagged her down.

“Hey! We’ve been waiting for over an hour! What’s going on?”

Carter to the defense. Amy loved it.

“I’m SO sorry, sir. We experienced issues in the kitchen. All sorted out now. Your food’ll be here in 5 minutes.”

The waitress rushed away. All color gone from her face. Replaced by sweat.

Imagine a circular puddle of hot sauce with smoke fuming out of it. That’s what Carter’s face looked like now.

“5 more minutes?! Is she kidding? I’m starving!” He pounded the table.

“I know, sweetie. It’s not her fault. It happens.” Amy forced a smile with the little energy she had. Most of it had been burned supporting her stomach growls.

It happens? Shit happens! And that’s what this place is! I’m not gonna support such crappy service!”

“But the food’ll be here in 5 minutes—”

“I don’t care! Nobody makes me wait 5 minutes!”

“But Carter — please. I’m really hungry.”

Her eyes should’ve been filled with pain, pleading and other persuasive emotions…

But they were as empty as her stomach.

She was too hungry to notice Carter wasn’t even looking at her eyes.

He was scanning her body.

“Hunger is good for you. I’ve noticed you’ve been packing on too much weight lately.”

Amy was speechless…

Not because her level of starvation was so high…

But because her level of surprise at Carter’s comment was higher.

He stood up and grabbed her arm.

“Let’s go!”

Amy saw their waitress walk out of the kitchen…

Carrying food so saliva-inducing her mouth turned into an ocean…

Their food…

And as she stood up to comply with Carter’s demand, her stomach growled in protest.

34 MINUTES LATER

The car rumbled along…

No, that was definitely Amy’s stomach.

The car was not even moving. They were stuck in city traffic.

Not Carter’s fault…

The service at that restaurant was horrible. No way they should support it.

And as Amy rubbed her stomach to calm it, she noticed she should definitely lose a few pounds…

Should definitely wait a few more hours to eat…

Carter was right. As always.

“…what makes them think they can make me wait…”

He was still fuming…

And as he continued to growl, so did Amy’s stomach…

And she kept nodding in agreement…

But she was not listening to him or her stomach…

She was wondering which diet plan to follow.

She respected Carter.

Always in control.

Always right.

The car rumbled along…

Final Important Thoughts

Can you guess what Lesson 6 is?

Ready for it?

Controlling Behavior Does NOT Equal Protective Love.

Have you been in a controlling relationship?

If so, like Amy, you likely rationalized the controlling behavior as good…

You likely appreciated it…

Maybe even enjoyed it…

But NEVER confuse controlling behavior with protective love.

Such behavior is not a sign of your partner’s strength nor love.

Instead…

It’s a sign of insecurity or selfishness.

Or both.

Most of my clients say their controlling partners do nice things…

Actions that appear to reflect their love…

And then hit them with negative talk.

Such behavior will keep you on the edge…

You feel loved & protected enough to stay put…

But insecure enough to be vulnerable.

And dependent.

One red flag to watch out for are insults about your appearance…

This time, Carter insulted Amy’s weight. Next time, it might be her clothes or something else physical.

Another red flag is invasion of your privacy, such as looking through your phone messages.

The next episode of Amy’s Story is Lesson 5

A lesson you’ll be very very happy to learn.

Why so happy? You’ll see…

Stay Tuned!
Debbie Pask

PS
Did you notice?

The last episode started with: “Carter, I don’t trust her.”

And ended with: “Carter, I trust you.”

This episode started AND ended with: “The car rumbled along…”

There’s a connection between the first and the last sentence of every episode from Lesson 7 to Lesson 1.

Keep that in mind as you read each first sentence.

And keep this in mind as you live your life…

The connection between different life events — especially beginnings & endings — is a powerful theme in Amy’s story.

And likely your life story, too.

This is a point which, you’ll see, will be UNFORGETTABLY made by Lesson 1

Please leave a rating for the Lesson 6 episode below so I know what you think. And then move on to Lesson 5


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